Trying to live like water.

“The highest goodness is like water. Water benefits all things and does not complete. It stays in the lowly places which others despise. Therefore it is near The Eternal.” –Lao Zi

A few years ago, I might’ve brushed that off. But life has a funny way of evolving our views. Now, Lao Zi’s wisdom really speaks to me and it even became my life philosophy. I am not trying to be the top 1% all the time, but learning how to embrace the beauty in the everyday. This makes me feel like I am living in my most satisfied state of life because I know how to enjoy my life and everyday is better than the one before. However, let’s be clear, I wasn’t always this zen.

Growing up with my mom and grandparents, they greatly influenced how I saw the world. They instilled in me the importance of resilience and always striving to make the fam proud. For many years, I was kind of just going through the motions, living ny other’s standards. Until recent years, out of nowhere, this big question hit me:”Who am I, really?”

Starting down this path of self-discovery at 16 was intense. It was like, “Do I even know myself at all?” As soon as I graduated from high school, I took a two-year gap year during which I went to therapy, tried to understand myself, and implicitly hoped I would come to understand what life was really all about (looking back, I think that going through therapy was a very lucky decision for me. It was also the most important choice I ever made.) Therapy helped me a lot in regaining strength to pull myself back together but it wasn’t an overnight fix. I spend a lot of time trying to find all the missing puzzles to make the picture of “me” complete. In fact, I’m still doing it. But one thing I realized throughout all these years — the reason why I struggled so much — is that my body and mind are not one, that’s why I feel pain. When I say “body”, I mean your behavior and every decision that you make; when I say “mind”, I mean what you really want deep down in your heart and thoughts that exist in your unconsciousness. Only when you are DOING what you really WANT, that’s when you can reach to your inner peace and you’ll find out that life has its own flow.

Chuang Tzu is my favorite Chinese philosopher and he is well known for his idea of life: “Wuwei”. His vibe is pretty close to where I’m at these days. It literally means “nothing is left undone”. It’s about living authentically and not pushing against your true nature. I know this idea may be a little bit vague, so think about it like this: when you are dating a person you like so much but you can’t be your genuine self in front of him/her. That, in Chuang Tzu perspective, you’re damaging your natural instinct because you are trying to pursue and possess something that doesn’t belong to you. And I must say, it’s so hard to let go (at least for me). But when I started practicing this philosophy in real life? It’s been a game-changer. My life’s become more laid-back and way more enjoyable. I’m rolling with the punches, just like water — adaptable and full of power.

–Blaire Ng

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